the chimes of freedom flashing 

Today a very smart and nice red haired guy, who's a bankruptcy attorney, is going to file my bankruptcy paperwork.

That makes it official.

I worked hard to get myself into this mess and I'm working hard to get myself out of it...meant in humor and in truth.

I'm getting a "bail out".

I'm giving up and giving in.

I also had to take the initiative, get the lawyer all the paperwork he needs, raise the funds for his fees, and have the courage to pull the trigger.

Some advised that I get a debt consolidation plan…

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Grateful at 6 a.m. 

It's still probably too soon to call it, but I do feel better.

I went back to bed yesterday around six or seven, after having a bowl of Nina's homemade minestrone..more of a stew than a soup..absolutely fantastic.

Here I am, up with my delightful salted caramel flavored cream in my dark roast coffee with an added spoonful of baker's chocolate powder stirred in.

It's six in the morning and I am feeling optimistic!

If I live through this I will be ready for the dawning of a new era for our entire world…

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day four of Rob G's mandated bed rest 

Today is the fourth day I'll try to do nothing but rest.

It's definitely helping to call it bed rest.

I'm not very good at resting.

Pledging to four days of bed rest, agreeing with Rob that it was necessary and promising to follow through, and having Nina and Rob around to enforce it.

These are the things that help.

Nina made Fire Cider a month ago, in a flurry of inspiration.

She'd never made it before, I'd never even heard of it before.

She read about it in a magazine, maybe in a gourmet food magazine.

Or…

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bed rest day three begins 

Bed rest.

Not my favorite phrase.

My mother has always said of me, "she burns the candle at both ends".

She has always said that she didn't think I could be a performer the way I had always wanted to be, playing shows on tour night after night, becuase I've always been such an early riser.

The shows, in my mother's mind, are for night life types who drink and smoke and carry on into the wee hours.

Performers should be people who were going to be up late anyway.

No, not I.

I can stay up until two in the…

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glimmer 

I have the glimmer of hope this morning.

This glimmer usually sets me in motion, getting up early..it's 6:30am now, and doing more, more, more.

I have a lot of ideas a lot of the time.

But, this time, even though I dare say I'm starting to feel like I will not have to set foot back in the dreaded ER, I've made the four day pledge.

I made a four day pledge to housemate Rob Genadek that I would stay in bed no matter how good..or bad..I feel.

Just give it four days of real devoted bedrest.

Today is only the…

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I made a four day pledge yesterday 

I made a four day pledge to Rob yesterday.

I pledged that I would do absolutely nothing for four days.

Just rest.

No nothing.

Just rest.

This came on the heels of a bad "spell" I had yesterday afternoon.

This is a strange virus, unpredictable on all counts.

I thought I was getting over it.

Suddenly yesterday afternoon around two I felt a fever coming on.

The fever lasted until around eight in the evening, and during that time my slight shortness of breath turned into alarming shortness of breath.

The whole…

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this illness seems to double back 

I had a great day yesterday.

I used my normal asthma inhaler...Advair disc...only once, in the morning, and then not again not even to go to bed.

I slept well all night.

I didn't feel the least bit feverish or lightheaded all day or evening.

I had a glass of wine and sat with Rob in the late afternoon sun yesterday afternoon in the back yard.

Nina brought the puppy to her father's to let him play with their Wheaten Terrier.

Nina returned still weakened by whatever it is we have, but happy she let the dog…

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The ER 

I felt like I couldn't get a deep breath two nights ago.

Nina was a sleep.

Rob was out burning the midnight oil in his recording studio out back in the garage.

Tobi the puppy was watching me on my bed.

I took an extra dose of my asthma medicine which is a steroid inhaler that I take every day of my life.

It didn't help.

I got scared.

I'd been feeling a tiny bit feverish and for a couple of days I'd been feeling like I was coming down with something.

I was afraid enough that I called the night line for my…

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tenderhearted people 

There's a lot of tenderhearted people in the world

 

They're putting up hospitals in Central Park

Looks just like the Civil War

And what I wouldn't give

to be on the front lines

Like a regular Florence Nightengale

I want to let it shine

there's a lot of tenderhearted people in the world

 

Save those broken hearted lovers from themselves

Keep the fearful from going off alone to their watery grave

Give a smile or a prayer or a wink of an eye

to the few who may walk out one morning

on their own two feet

to the…

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new song today 

I lay awake in a half dream state

visions of sugarplums

me on the stage 

big shining guitar

like a sequin cowgirl

queen of the new folk scene

 

and I lay in a hazy daze of springtime in quarantine

the fever overtook me

and the black dog's eyes met mine

the holy ghost like a shadow

casting blessings over me

 

no more winter

and the grass smells so green

when I'm well again I swear

I'll treat you better than anything you've ever seen

 

come undone

As the Plague rages

I can hear the girl next door

getting…

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Upcoming Dates (click calendar link for more)

Apr7

private book club appearance for "A Girl Called Sidney: The Coldest Place" on Zoom!

Book Club appearance Minneapolis

Apr24

postponed....trio concert

Reunion Bar Northfield, MN, 501 Division Street S., Northfield, MN